It can be hard to come out. Everyone has their own unique struggles, challenges and hurdles to overcome when speaking their truth to the world — and for some people, it is being already married to a person that doesn’t align with their sexuality. Luckily, TikTok is here to help.
In recent years, as TikTok has taken off, more and more queer people have shown up. The platform offers a place to connect with other LGBTQ+ folks, help you feel understood, and ultimately, provide a representation of scenarios you might be struggling with as a queer person. The already-married scenario included.
Now, more and more women are coming to terms with who they truly are, and wondering what to do next.
Whether you’re married and struggling to come out, or you’re newly out and trying to figure out your next move, these 3 queer TikTok creators have been through it themselves.
These Queer Women (Who Have Been There) Are Helping Married Women Come Out
Alayna Joy — most known for her YouTube channel with over 386k subscribers — is a now-identifying lesbian who makes TikTok and YouTube content mostly about sexuality.
Pre-2020, Alayna primarily became known for her videos about her bisexuality, and her relationship with her ex-fiance. But in May of 2020, the YouTuber made a 15-minute video that revealed how she came to terms with herself and her sexuality: She isn’t bisexual, she is actually a lesbian. She was nervous but spoke her truth to the people who have grown with her over the years.
Now, almost three years later, Alayna is thriving in who she is and what she wants out of her life. She went from being unsure of herself, to proudly proclaiming who she is fully. On TikTok, she currently makes videos about being a lesbian and learning more about herself.
Personally, I find her to be extremely inspirational. And for those of us who have experienced similar feelings and scenarios, it can be comforting to know we’re not alone.
On TikTok, @Raising2Activists makes videos about her experience being married to a man for 13 years, having two children and then coming out as a lesbian.
If you’re married to a man and struggling to come out, or you’ve already gone through it, then her videos might be for you. Her voice is warm and comforting. I personally find that her content is a joy to watch.
As of recently, she has also begun documenting her journey of being in a lesbian relationship and how that has felt for her. Known as a #LateInLifeLesbian, she aims to help others feel less alone in living their best and most honest life.
Perhaps the most “famous” of them all, Glennon Doyle is the New York Times best-selling author of Untamed, which shares her story of coming out as queer much later on in her life. Before her marriage to her wife Abby Wambach, Glennon was married to a man whom she has three children with.
Through the telling of her story, Glennon has captured the hearts of every queer who is both in and out of the closet. And now several years out of her #LateInLife reveal, she makes wonderfully fun TikTok videos of her and her wife together.
Personally, Glennon’s story has given me strength in times when I didn’t feel I could proudly proclaim who I was. When I read Untamed for the first time, I remember identifying so strongly with some of the things she said about her feelings and identity. It makes me happy to see her thriving.
As she would say, she is a wild cheetah living her most true, authentic and beautiful life. And she wants to encourage every queer person to do the same.